Open -- Turk and J.D.'s Apartment, night-time.
The guys are sitting on a couch across from Elliot and Carla, who sit on another couch.
A heated discussion is taking place between the two women.
Elliot: ---You could just let it go?
Carla: No, I don't wanna let it go. It's a simple question -- why wouldn't I want to go to the symphony?
Elliot: No, I--I--I didn't mean anything by it.
Carla: Of course you meant something by it.
They continue arguing, as Turk and J.D. quietly discuss the situation.
J.D.: We've got to do something about this.
Turk: No.... We really don't.
J.D.: Come on, Carla's your girlfriend, Elliot's my friend....
Turk: Dude, trust me, don't get involved.
They turn their attention back to the argument.
Carla: So, if she's from el barrio, she must not like music.
Elliot: All I'm saying is that classical music isn't for everyone.
Carla: Ohh, so because I didn't grow up with a nanny changing my Vera Wang diap---
Turk looks at his watch, and J.D. makes an audible sigh. The two women turn their attention to him.
Carla: [to J.D.] You got something to say?
Turk begins shaking his head.
Turk: Mm-mm.
J.D.: Well, yes, frankly, I think that [to Elliot] you're being condescending and [to Carla] you're being overly sensitive.
Turk knows this was a bad move.
The two women turn all their anger on to J.D., simultaneously yelling at him - Elliot going on about "It's really ironic that you're accusing me of being condescending..." and Carla saying something about "Nobody asked you."
J.D. listens for a moment, then:
***Fantasy sequence:
J.D.: 'Scuse me for a second... just one second.
He gets up off the couch and goes over to a lever that is mounted on the wall. He pulls the handle into the "rewind" position, and waits as the events of the past few minutes are rewound. He pushes the lever back into its original position and sits back down.
Carla: So if she grew up in the barrio, she must not like classical music.
Elliot: All I'm saying is that classical music isn't for everyone.
Carla: Oh, so because I didn't grow up with a nanny changing my Vera Wang diapers---
J.D. sighs again, just as before.
Carla: [to J.D.] You got something to say?
Turk, again, shakes his head wildly.
Turk: Mm-mm.
J.D.'s Thoughts: Nope. Not this time.
He fights the urge, but eventually succumbs.
J.D.: Well, yes, frankly, I think that [to Elliot] y-you're being condescending and [to Carla] you're being overly sensitive.
Turk Rolls his eyes and awaits the inevitable. The wait isn't long because, just as before, the women turn their anger on to J.D.
J.D.: [to self] Dammit!
~*~
OPENING THEME
COMMERCIAL
~*~
The Hospital, exterior -- daytime. "Dracula From Houston" by The Butthole Surfers plays.
J.D. is coming in to work.
Cut to: interior. The Hallway Outside The Admissions Area.
J.D., armed with a chart, heads down the hall. He passes Elliot who is traveling in another direction. She, in turn, passes Turk, who is headed in his own way.
J.D.'s Narration: Here's something that's kind of surprising: On my first day my resident told me, if you don't count the maternity ward -- which is mostly, well, you know [pan past a pregnant woman with two young children in tow] -- or the emergency room -- which is mostly broken bones, stitches, you know, that sort of thing -- he said that, one out of every three patients that's admitted to this place...will die here.
The screen splits three ways as Elliot, Turk, and J.D. step into the rooms of their respective patients.
Turk
Elliot: Hi, I'm gonna be your doctor.
J.D.
We join J.D. in the room of his patient, an older woman, Mrs. Tanner. Her family is standing around her bed, bickering.
J.D.: [talking over the din] Hello? I'm the doctor!
They turn to look at him.
J.D.: [self conscious] I'm...I'm...I'm the doctor.
He fiddles with his stethoscope as proof.
Guy: What are you, sixteen?
Woman: Oh, this is unacceptable.
Guy: What'd you have, like, coupons to this hospital, ma?
Woman: I should--we should have gone to my doctor.
Mrs. Tanner: Now that's enough! Now, sure, he's young, but he's probably a very good doctor. [to J.D.] Are you a good doctor?
J.D.: It's kinda too soon to tell.
Mrs. Tanner: Honesty.... Well, I like that. [quietly] You probably want these people to wait outside.
J.D.: That'd be nice.
Mrs. Tanner: Make 'em know you're a man, not a boy.
He turns to the family.
J.D.: Uhh... would you guys mind....
Woman: I'm fine where I am, thank you.
Guy: Make me.
J.D. looks to Mrs. Tanner.
Mrs. Tanner: [whispering encouragingly] Do it.
J.D.: [yelling] Everybody outta here, now!
The family make noises about yelling not being necessary, but nonetheless, it gets them to leave.
J.D.: [amazed] "Now!" [laughs]
Mrs. Tanner: Well, that was manly!
J.D.: Right... that's what I'm talkin' about.
She reaches over to her bedside and holds up a piece of candy.
Mrs. Tanner: Want a hard candy?
J.D.: Yes, please!
Cut to: Another Private Patient's Room
A group of surgeons, including Turk and Dr. Wen, stand over the bed of a young man, David. His TV broadcasts sports in the background.
Turk: I'd say this is a simple laparoscopic hernia repair, sir.
Dr. Wen: [nods] Mm.
David: Oh, see, this is embarrassing -- you guys are wearing the same outfit. Don't sweat it, I'm not wearing pants. [laughs] Aw, come on, that was funny!
Dr. Wen: Great. Moving on.
The surgeons leave.
David: [calling after them] Where're you guys going? ESPN Classic's showing the '82 NFC championship -- it's The Catch! Can I have some nurses over?
Cut to: Yet Another Private Patient's Room
Elliot faces her patient, Mrs. Guerrero -- a middle-aged Hispanic woman -- who stares at her questioningly.
Elliot: I called down and requested a Spanish-speaking nurse.
The woman looks at Elliot and raises her brow.
Elliot: So... no English, huh?
The woman smiles apologetically.
Elliot: [taking advantage of the situation to amuse herself] I'm a chunky monkey from funky town.
Carla walks in behind her.
Carla: I'm gonna have a little trouble translating that.
Elliot turns.
Elliot: [sarcastic] Oh good, it's you.
~*~
The Doctors' Lounge
The television displays an aerobic exercise program. Turk is working out along with the instructor on the set.
J.D. walks in, and gets a cup of coffee.
J.D.: I admitted this really neat old lady today.
Turk: [pausing his routine] "Neat"? Dude, the 1930s called and they want their lingo back.
He resumes dancing around.
J.D.: No, we had, like, this connection, you know?
Turk: No, I don't know. Please, let me get my sweat on.
J.D. watches Turk "get his sweat on".
J.D.'s Narration: Surgeons generally don't like to get too close to patients. Maybe it makes it harder to cut someone open... maybe it's just too risky... I dunno.
J.D.: I feel like you're missing out. Like, this Mrs. Tanner, she's got this...incredible energy and...and warmth.
Turk: [stops aerobicizing] Dude, the League of Women Voters called and they want to know where to send your membership info.
J.D.: You're using that "somebody called" joke a lot.
Turk: I know, I can't help it. I got a hernia patient to take care of.
J.D.: What's his name?
Turk: Well, his name is Hernia Patient, but we've gotten close so I like to call him "Hernia".
He starts to leave.
J.D.: [sarcastic] He must feel so safe and taken care of.
Turk: Shut up.
~*~ Mrs. Guerrero's Room
Elliot is trying to reassure her patient.
Elliot: I paged Dr. Cox and he should be here any second.
Carla pushes past Elliot and approaches Mrs. Guerrero.
Carla: [translating] {Something in Spanish}
Mrs. Guerrero: {Spanish}
Elliot: What'd she say?
Carla: Oh, she said she thinks it's amazing that your fancy private school didn't teach you any Spanish, considering that a third of your patients speak it as a primary language.
Elliot: [laughing] Oh, yeah, like every doctor here speaks Spanish.
Dr. Cox enters the room.
Dr. Cox: Hola, Señora Guerrero! Como se siente hoy?
Mrs. Guerrero: {some Spanish} ...no muy bien.
Dr. Cox: Ah, bueno. [turns to Elliot] What now, Dr. Barbie?
Elliot: Mrs. Guerrero's a forty-year-old Lupus patient who presented with shortness of breath; so I started her on a Heparin drip and ordered a VQ scan. I just wanted to run that by you---
Dr. Cox: One, two, three---
Elliot: So should I continue with the Hep---
Dr. Cox: It's really important that you let me get to ten.
Elliot: Well, I just thought---
Dr. Cox: Listen, cookie, you've been here over a month. This is Medicine 101: I don't want every little thing run by me; [she attempts to interrupt him, but he continues, while smiling occasionally at Mrs. Guerrero] I don't wanna give you my two cents' worth. But if you ever do wanna know my opinion, rest assured it will always be that you're an incredible pain and that every time I see your kew-pie-doll face, it just makes me wanna pick you up and shake you until all the hours of my life that you've wasted...fall out. Now laugh.
Elliot: What?
Dr. Cox: [smiling] Laugh so that she doesn't think I'm yelling at you.
He begins laughing, and Carla enthusiastically joins in. Elliot does her bit, which relieves Mrs. Guerrero, who begins smiling and laughing, too.
Dr. Cox, still laughing, gives Carla a small high-five on his way out of the room.
Carla: [regaining herself] Ohh!... How fun was that!
She pushes past a stunned Elliot and walks out the door.
~*~
The Hallway
Dr. Kelso is signing a form for a delivery man. J.D., carrying a chart, walks up behind him.
J.D.: Dr. Kelso.... Hi. I wanted to get your opinion about a patient.
Dr. Kelso grunts his approval, and they begin walking down the hall. Up ahead, the Janitor, who was mopping the floor, begins staring at J.D., making him quite nervous.
J.D.: She's uh... a seventy-four-year-old renal failure, Mrs. Tanner.
Dr. Kelso: Oh, of course! One of our frequent fliers -- she's a neat lady.
J.D.: That's what I said!
Dr. Kelso: Nobody likes a brown-nose, son. Let me see the chart.
He takes it from J.D. and begins reading. J.D. stands waiting, his eyes locked on the Janitor, who begins mouthing something at him. J.D. puts his hand to his ear and mouths back "What?" So, the Janitor repeats, this time with hand motions: he points to himself -- "I'm" -- then he makes a walking motion -- "going" -- he holds up two fingers -- "to" -- he wrings an imaginary neck -- "kill" -- and he points at J.D. -- "you."
J.D.: [barely audible] Why?
The Janitor shrugs. Dr. Kelso finishes reading and looks up, prompting the Janitor to go back to mopping the floor.
Dr. Kelso: We'll put her on diuretics.
J.D.: [distracted by the Janitor] Yeah... I ordered them.
With Dr. Kelso looking back at the chart and J.D. still staring at him, the Janitor takes the opportunity to carry the game a bit farther by twisting an imaginary head off an imaginary neck and plopping it on the end of the mop handle; he dances the morbid puppet around.
Dr. Kelso: These labs don't look good; I think it's time she got started on dialysis.
He moves on to Mrs. Tanner's room, and J.D., still nervously watching the Janitor, follows behind. As they enter the room, the Janitor pushes the mop past the doorway, extending his hold on J.D.'s attention.
Dr. Kelso: Oh, but you know what you should do first, kiddo?
J.D.: What's that?
Dr. Kelso: Find her.
J.D. turns to look at the old woman's empty bed.
***Fantasy Sequence: Outside a high-security compound, surrounded by a barbed-wire fence -- night-time.
Inside the security area, search crews, aided by lights and search dogs, and helicopters overhead, spring to action. Just outside the fence, Mrs. Tanner, covered in dirt, emerges from an escape hole.
Mrs. Tanner: Freedom!!!
Popping her walker out with her, she proceeds with her escape.
***End of Sequence, J.D. looks bewildered.
He finds a note on her bed, and reads it.
J.D.: [reading] "Went to the park"?
Dr. Kelso turns and leaves. J.D. turns around to share the news with him, but is left to only repeat it to himself.
J.D.: She.... She... went to the park.
~*~
David's Room
David watches his TV as a nurse stands by taking his pulse.
David: It's The Catch.
The nurse doesn't even look up from her watch.
David: The Catch? Say "Catch," no response. How could no one in this hospital know what The Catch is?
Turk enters the room, passing the exiting nurse.
Turk: 'Niners-Cowboys, Joe Montana to Dwight Clarke deep in the end-zone, zero time left. Kid, please, don't insult me.
After grabbing David's chart, he begins to leave, but David calls after him:
David: Hey, come on, man; it's the fourth quarter, you got a minute?
Turk considers it for a moment.
Turk: ...Sure.
David: Cool.
Turk takes a seat in the chair next to the bed.
Turk: David, right?
David: Yeah.
Turk: I'm Turk.
David: What's up. [holds out his arm] You want some IV?
Turk: No, I'm good.
David: You sure?
Turk: Mm.
They sit and watch the TV.
~*~
The Park
J.D. marches up to a small group of people who are standing around a picnic table festooned with birthday party decorations. At the center sits Mrs. Tanner, with a small, pig-tailed child sitting in her lap.
J.D.: Mrs. Tanner....
Guy: Oh, here's the party.
J.D.: Look, I don't know how it's been with your other doctors, but when you're under my care, you stay in the hospital until I say it's okay for you to leave.
Mrs. Tanner: We saved you a plate.
J.D.: I don't care about food right now!
He looks down at the table.
J.D.'s Thoughts: Oh, my God, are those s'mores?
Mrs. Tanner: Look, it's Samantha's fifth birthday. Now you're not gonna make me miss this, are you?
J.D. relents.
J.D.: [looking at the gigantic cake in the middle of the table] Couldn't you have got her a big cake?
~*~
Mrs. Guerrero's Room
Elliot and Carla are taking care of the woman, who looks weaker than before.
Elliot: [writing in a chart] I'm gonna order an ABG just to be safe.... Don't you think?
Carla: Yeah, that's probably a good idea.
Elliot: Hey, teach me to tell her she's doing fine.
Carla: Um... okay. Say, um, "Esta...progresando...muy bien."
Elliot: Mrs. Guerrero? Um... esta...progresando...m-muy bien.
The woman grasps Elliot's hand and smiles.
Mrs. Guerrero: Ah! Gracias.
Elliot: Ooh! It worked!
Carla smiles at her.
~*~
The Hallway
Two staff members open a set of internal doors for Turk, who pushes David's wheelchair through.
Turk: [encouraging David] All right, listen, the important thing to remember is this is not gonna hurt as much as you think.
David: [steeling himself] I'm ready.
Turk pushes the wheelchair faster, then lets go. David raises his hands above his head as he speeds towards some large cylinders arranged in a triangle pattern at the end of the hall. He crashes through, knocking every one of them down. David, Turk, and the crowd that had gathered all cheer the "strike."
~*~
The Park
J.D. sits next to Mrs. Tanner and Samantha at the picnic table. He wears a party hat and chocolate smeared on his mouth. Samantha repeatedly blows a noisemaker in his face until he takes the toy away from her and turns his attention to Mrs. Tanner.
J.D.: Okay, you know what, Mrs. Tanner....
She wipes his mouth as she speaks:
Mrs. Tanner: Just until Samantha blows out her candles. [to the girl] What are you gonna wish for, honey? Uhhhhm.... a bike?
Samantha: [thinking] Nope.
Mrs. Tanner: A doll house?
Samantha: Nope.
J.D.: How about the ability to make quick decisions?
The girl thinks hard.
Samantha: Umm... Nope.
J.D.: How 'bout this?
He pushes Samantha's face into her cake -- once, twice, three times. The family gasps, and the young girl shakes the frosting off of her face. Alas, it was only a fantasy. At the end of which, Mrs. Tanner is still going through the wish-list.
Mrs. Tanner: Uh, a pony!
Samantha: No!
J.D.: Okay, enough of this. I don't think any of you realize how serious this is. Right now we need to be worried about your mother, your grandmother... your....
He notices someone sitting across the table.
J.D.: I'm sorry, we--we haven't met, I'm Dr. Dorian.
He shakes the person's hand.
Mrs. Tanner: [laughing] You're very cute.
J.D.: Thank you. Come on, let's go.
Mrs. Tanner: Candles are still lit.
J.D.: Okay, here we go.
He picks up Samantha and holds her over the cake.
J.D.: Blow!
The two put out the candles.
~*~
Mrs. Guerrero's Room
Elliot stands next to the bed, going over a chart, on the other side of the bed behind her, Carla adjusts the settings on the woman's monitor.
Elliot: I increased the Heparin to 1500 units per hour. Does...that sound like enough?
Carla: Should be.
Elliot: Speaking of Heparin, have you slept with Turk yet?
Carla spins around to look at her.
Carla: What!?
Elliot: I'm sorry, I'm--no, I'm sorry... too personal.
Carla looks down at Mrs. Guerrero, and thinks for a moment.
Carla: I like to wait. I like a guy to want it so bad he basically thinks he isn't gonna get it ever.
Elliot smiles.
Carla: [continuing] Then when he's lost the will to live, that's when I jump him.
Elliot: So, how long does that usually---
Carla: A month, maybe two. What about you?
Elliot: I like to use sex as an ice-breaker.
Carla: Ah. And how's that working out for you?
Elliot: I guess I don't have what you would call high self-esteem.
Carla laughs.
~*~
The OR
Turk and another, female surgical intern stand over David, who lies unconscious on the operating table.
Dr. Wen passes behind them.
Dr. Wen: Let me know when you find the hernia.
Turk: You got it.
As they work, the two intently watch a monitor that displays what the endoscope sees.
Girl: We're so lost.
Turk: We're not lost.
Girl: Go left, here.
Turk: It's a right.
Girl: You passed his Cooper's ligament three times already. Just stop and ask for directions!
Turk: Do you want to drive this thing? 'Cause I will pull--I will pull this thing over and let you drive this thing!
Dr. Wen comes up behind Turk and watches the monitor over his shoulder.
Dr. Wen: Wait a second. Go back to where you just were.
Turk moves his instruments back. All three watch the monitor as a large, dark mass comes into view.
Turk: What is that?
Cut to: Mrs. Guerrero's Room
The woman's monitor attracts Carla's attention.
Carla: Hey. Her O sat's in the eighties; and take a look at her heart rate.
Elliot comes around the bed to see.
Elliot: Shoot.
Cut to: Mrs. Tanner's Room.
J.D. sits in the chair next to Mrs. Tanner's bed.
J.D.: So, that's basically it. Your kidneys aren't responding to the medication anymore. I'm afraid we're gonna have to start you on dialysis.
Mrs. Tanner: Oh, I'm not a big fan of dialysis.
J.D.: Yeah, unfortunately we don't really have a choice.
Mrs. Tanner: Well, actually, I do have a choice.
J.D looks confused.
J.D.'s Narration: Certain things you never expect to come out of a person's mouth.
Mrs. Tanner: I think I'm ready to die.
J.D. gives her a blank stare.
***Fantasy Sequence: The delivery man enters the room.
Delivery Man: I've got a ton of bricks for Dr. Dorian?
He holds a clip board up to J.D. and hands him a pen. J.D. signs the delivery slip and the man steps back, looking up towards the ceiling. As J.D. turns his attention back to Mrs. Tanner, still looking utterly dumbfounded, a large amount of bricks fall on him, knocking him out of the chair.
Delivery Man: Could I get that pen back?
J.D. pushes his hand through the rubble and holds up the pen.
~*~
COMMERCIAL
~*~
Re-open: "Dracula From Houston" plays again as Elliot and Carla stare at Mrs. Guerrero's monitor; Turk looks at David on the table, then to Dr. Wen, who gives a slight nod; J.D. continues to stare at Mrs. Tanner in disbelief.
Mrs. Tanner: You're gonna have to shut your mouth at some point.
Realizing that his surprise is evident, J.D. closes his slightly agape mouth.
Mrs. Tanner: Sweetie, I'm seventy-four years old, I'm ready to go.
J.D.: Yeah, but with dialysis, you could live another...eighty or ninety years.
Mrs. Tanner: I think you're being a little irrational.
J.D.: No I'm not.
Mrs. Tanner: Everybody dies sometime.
J.D.: No they don't.
Cut to: The Nurses' Station.
Turk is on the phone.
Turk: Actually, sir, I think we're really lucky we found the lymphoma when we did. ... [listens] ... 'Course. ... No, yeah, I'll wait for you to get here before I tell David anything. ... [listens] ... Okay, see you soon.
Dr. Kelso approaches as he hangs up the phone.
Dr. Kelso: Gosh, sport, I sure hope you're not using that phone to make a personal call.
He starts walking down the hall, and Turk follows him.
Turk: No, actually, sir, that was David Morrison's father. He's a patient of mine. Dave's a good kid.
Dr. Kelso: Well, he sounds terrific; you two are becoming best pals, huh? Well, you know what we should do? The three of us should play ourselves a game of stickball.
Turk: Sir?
Dr. Kelso: Sure, all we need is a stick and a ball and a pocketful of dreams. Or, we could take turns bowling your patient down the hallways of my hospital.
Turk: Okay, listen, sir, I can explain. That's---
Dr. Kelso: Spare me.
Turk: [laughing] Spare you! That's good, sir... 'cause of the bowling thing. That's--- You're not making a joke are you.
Dr. Kelso: Not at the moment.
Turk: I just think he's a good kid, and I really thought he needed a friend.
Dr. Kelso: Young man, your patients don't need friends; they need a doctor.
Dr. Kelso walks on ahead, and Turk stops to take in his words.
Cut to: Another Hallway.
Elliot and Carla are walking through towards Mrs. Guerrero's room, discussing the woman's condition.
Elliot: Her BP's dropping; maybe it's time to push thrombolitics. If you were her doctor, what would you do?
Carla: That's way out of my league, Elliot!
Elliot: I don't know about waiting; I mean, she seems to be decompensating. But, thrombolitics scare me. I mean, a lot of times, the patient bleeds out.
They arrive at the woman's room. Mrs. Guerrero, looking very run-down, looks at them.
Carla: She needs to know what's going on.
Elliot looks at the woman, and takes a deep breath.
Elliot: Uh... I'll be right back.
She flees the room.
~*~
The ICU
Dr. Cox and J.D. are walking together through the main area of the unit.
Dr. Cox: So, she doesn't want dialysis?
J.D.: Yeah, what does that mean, I mean---
Dr. Cox: Well, if she doesn't want dialysis, then there is no ethical dilemma.
J.D.: But what about our duty as doctors to do everything in our power to help pe---
Dr. Cox: [pretending to cry] 'What about our duty as doctors?' [he stops to face J.D.] Look. This has nothing to do with the patient -- it's all about you. You are afraid of death, and you can't be. You're in medicine, you gotta accept the fact that everything we do here -- everything -- is a stall. We're just trying to keep the game going; that's it. But, ultimately, it always ends up the same way.
***Fantasy sequence:
J.D. glances off to the side, and does a double take. In the corner the Grim Reaper stands next to a gurney with a Connect Four game set up on it. J.D. sits opposite the Reaper.
Grim Reaper: I win.
J.D.: Where, I don't see?
Grim Reaper: Here [with a bony finger, he points to the game], diagonally.
J.D.: Pretty sneaky, Death!
***End of Sequence, J.D. whips his attention back to Dr. Cox.
Dr. Cox: Hope I helped.
He walks away, leaving J.D. with his thoughts.
~*~
David's Room
We see a close-up shot of an anatomy diagram of the human head on the wall.
David is in his bed, and Turk stands next to him.
David: So that Dr. Kelso guy really came down on you, huh?
Turk: Yeah, but he's got a point, this is a hospital -- it's not a playground.
He tosses a needle at the diagram, which sticks like a dart.
Turk: Well, if it's not the medulla oblongata. That's about fifty points, there, wouldn't you say? I won? I'll just take your fruit cup and be on my way.
Turk grabs an item off of David's food tray and starts for the door. David watches after him.
David: I talked to my dad, today.
Turk turns to face the young man.
David: He's coming out.
Turk: Cool.
David: And that, uh, that nurse came by to shave me again.
Turk: Hey, I didn't tell her to do that.
David: You didn't?
Turk: No; I think she's got a crush on you.
He smiles, but David looks serious.
David: Come on, dude, what's going on?
Turk: Okay... Uh, here's the deal....
He walks back over to David's bedside, and begins talking.
Cut to: Mrs. Tanner's Room
Her family is gathered around her bed. J.D. watches the proceedings from outside her open door.
J.D.'s Thoughts: She's telling her family. There's nothing that could make me go in there right now.
Over his shoulder, we see the Janitor approach from behind with a floor buffer. J.D. turns at the noise, and it turns in to a classic stand-off. The Janitor revs the machine, and heads straight for J.D., who ducks into Mrs. Tanner's room just as her family is leaving. He quickly shuts the door behind him.
Mrs. Tanner looks at him.
J.D.: You didn't tell them, did you.
Mrs. Tanner: It didn't come up. Look, they don't need that burden; besides, they'd just give me a bunch of reasons to change my mind.
J.D.: Speaking of which, I took the liberty of jotting down a few things I think everybody should do at least once in their life.
He removes a small notepad and a pen from his pocket.
Mrs. Tanner: Oh, no.
J.D.: Okay. [reading] "Number One: Eat a sausage-and-pepper hoagie from Enrico's."
Mrs. Tanner: Well, of course I've done that.
J.D.: "Number Two: Go to Asia."
Mrs. Tanner: {something in Japanese}
J.D.: I'm gonna take that as a yes, and I'll also check off "Learn a foreign language".
Mrs. Tanner: Mm-hmm.
Cut to: The Darkened Doctor's Lounge.
Elliot stands, staring at the drink machine. Carla, obviously looking for her, storms into the room.
Carla: What the hell happened to "I'll be right back"? I can't believe I actually started to think I've been wrong about you. That woman needs her doctor to tell her something, anything, and you run away? Are you even gonna look at me?
Elliot turns to her.
Elliot: Oh, I've been trying to decide what drink to get. I've been standing here trying to choose between cherry soda and, uh, ginger ale. And you know what? It's a toss-up. I mean, either way I get a cold drink, right? And it would be almost impossible for me to kill someone with this decision, but... I still can't make it. [her voice cracks] I think I'm in trouble here.
Carla comes up to her.
Carla: Look, I don't think these kinds of decisions are easy for anyone. And if it's any consolation, one of the reasons I never liked you is because you're already better at this than most of the doctors that come through here; and to be honest, I kinda liked being the only smart, strong chick in the joint.
Elliot: You sort of just complimented me.
Carla: Little bit.
Elliot: [taking a breath] Okay, I'm gonna have a ginger ale.
Carla: Good start.
Elliot pushes the button and fetches her drink.
Elliot: And...that clot isn't going anywhere on its own; so, let's push the thrombolitics.
Carla: Okay.
Elliot: Here we go.
Carla touches her arm as they head out the door.
~*~
Mrs. Tanner's Room
J.D. sits on the floor, leaning against the wall opposite the woman's bed. He still has his notepad, which has a good portion of turned pages.
J.D.: "Go to the top of the Eiffel Tower."
Mrs. Tanner: Done.
J.D.: Fine. "Go to the top of the Meiffel Tower."
He looks up at her.
Mrs. Tanner: Oh, now you're making stuff up.
J.D.: No, I'm not; it's right here, you can look at it!
He turns the notepad in her direction.
Mrs. Tanner: Listen, Dr. Dorian, there's not one thing I regret as I lay here right now. I'm ready. I really am.
J.D.: [flipping through the pad] You have had an amazing life.
Mrs. Tanner: Good, then we agree. Now, aren't there other patients you need to be seeing?
J.D.: Me? No, no, I've--I've been off for two hours.
Mrs. Tanner: So, with your precious free time, you've been sitting in a hospital room talking to an old lady. What about your list? How many of those things have you done? For that matter, how many times have you sat in the grass and done nothing, hm?
J.D. looks at her, unable to answer.
Mrs. Tanner: You need to start taking some time for yourself, young man. Promise me you'll do that.
J.D.: I will.
Mrs. Tanner: Good. Now, get outta here. Go on.
J.D.: Yeah, well, let me--I just want to check out a few things before I...get going.
He stands up and goes over to her monitor, intently watching it as he presses some buttons.
J.D.: [reading the monitor] Uh-huh.... Uhh-huh....
Mrs. Tanner: Are you okay?
He turns to her.
J.D.: I'm scared.
She gestures to him.
Mrs. Tanner: Come here.... Come here.... Come here.
He comes over and sits on the edge of her bed. She wraps her arms around him, and he rests his head on her shoulder as she comforts him:
Mrs. Tanner: You're okay.... You'll be just fine.... Not to worry.
John Cale's "Hallelujah" begins to play, as the scene changes to a montage:
Turk and a group of doctors and nurses wheel the unconscious David through the hall to the OR.
Elliot and Carla set up the drip for Mrs. Guerrero's treatment.
J.D. sits at the sleeping Mrs. Tanner's bedside.
Turk and the surgical team perform on David.
J.D. continues to hold his vigil.
A heart monitor goes flat-line. And all three turn to look.
....
In Mrs. Tanner's room, J.D. stands with her family next to the empty bed.
J.D.: I just want you to know that she went very peacefully....
....
Hanging his head, Turk sits with David's Father in the Admissions Area.
David's Father: I know you did everything you could for my son. I can't tell you how glad I am he had a friend here with him.
Turk looks up to the man.
....
Dr. Cox, Carla, and Elliot stand in Mrs. Guerrero's empty room.
Dr. Cox: [to Elliot, as he goes over the chart] Don't second guess yourself. You made the right call; you did.
He hands the chart to her.
Elliot: I know.
Over the cut-scenes of J.D. talking to Mrs. Tanner's family, Turk talking to David's father, and Elliot talking to one of Mrs. Guerrero's family members:
J.D.'s Narration: So, they say that one out of every three patients admitted to this place will die here. But, some days the odds are worse than that.
Split screen:
Turk
Elliot: I'm really sorry.
J.D.
Cut to: A Semi-Private Patient's room -- another day.
Turk and his fellow surgeons are finishing a patient consult and start to leave.
J.D.'s Narration: And on days like that, I guess the best you can hope for is that you took something from it.
Turk turns back and walks over to the patient, extending his hand.
Turk: Hey, I'm Turk.
J.D.'s Narration: ...Anything....
Cut to: The Hallway
Elliot is walking behind a group of nurses leading a patient on a gurney. She reads a chart and confidently directs the others on the patient's care.
J.D.'s Narration: ...Anything at all....
Cut to: The Park
J.D. lies in the grass, his eyes closed.
J.D.'s Narration: ....Even if it's just taking the time to lie in the grass and think about all the things you still have left to do.
He opens his eyes and sits up as he's joined by Turk, Elliot and Carla.
The song concludes.
END
